69 Hilarious Potato Jokes to Tell Your Friends Today

Who does not love potatoes? Bakes, boiled, mashed, or fried, potatoes come in all shapes and sizes.

Pasta jokes, banana jokes, or egg jokes – we love them all!

However, potato jokes are probably our favorite!

Let’s have a good laugh together!

Best Potato Jokes

1. What do you call potatoes with right angles?

Square roots.

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2. What’s a potato’s favorite horror movie?

The Silence of the Yams.

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3. What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water?

A hesi-tater.

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4. Who is the most powerful potato?

Darth Tater

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5. What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes?

A medi-tator.

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6. What do you get when you put an elephant and a load of potatoes together?

Mashed potatoes.

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7. What do you call a potato at a football game?

A spec-tater.

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8. Which disease is the biggest killer of potatoes?

Tuber-culosis.

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9. What do you call a fake potato?

An imi-tater.

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10. Why was the potato taken to a psychiatric hospital?

It was starch raving mad.

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11. What do you call a potato that’s always looking for a fight?

An agi-tater.

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12. I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories.

I was impressed, but to her, it was just small potatoes.

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13. What do you call a spinning potato?

A rotate-o.

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14. Why shouldn’t you give a zombie mashed potatoes?

Because they’re already a little grave-y.

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15. What do you call a chip that makes fun of you?

A tater-taunt.

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16. What do you call a yam with a broom?

A sweep potato.

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17. How do you know a potato is in a bad mood?

When they’re acting salty.

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18. What do you call a stolen yam?

A hot potato.

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19. All potato puns are…

pomme de terrible.

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Funny Potato Jokes

20. Why did the potato cross the road?

He saw a fork up ahead.

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21. Why did the potato salad blush?

Because it saw the salad dressing.

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22. How does a potato win at Street Fighter?

By mashing the kick button.

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23. Who is a potato’s favorite author?

Edgar Allen Poe-tato.

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24. What do you get when you cross a tater with a race car?

Crashed potato.

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25. Why do potatoes make good detectives?

Because they keep their eyes peeled.

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26. What does a potato say on a sunny morning?

What a mashing day!

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27. What do you use to carry potatoes?

A tater tote.

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28. I yam always very happy…

to eat sweet potatoes.

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29. What did the sweet potato say to the regular potato?

“I yam what I yam.”

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30. What do you say to a baked potato that’s angry?

Anything you like, just butter it up.

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31. What do you call a baby potato?

Small fry.

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32. What’s a potato’s favorite TV show?

Starch Trek.

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33. A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.

She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet?”

He said, “It’s just the way I yam.”

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34. What do you call a chip with glasses?

A spec-tater.

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35. What do you get after a potato rainstorm?

Spuddles.

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36. What do you call a lazy spud?

A couch potato.

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37. Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off?

It was decap-potatoed.

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38. What do you call a lethargic baby kangaroo?

A pouch potato.

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39. What did the father potato say to his daughter before her football game?

I’m rooting for you.

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40. What do you call a good-looking french fry?

A hot potato.

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41. What do you call a first aid vehicle made out of potatoes?

A yambulance.

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42. Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone?

He desperately wanted a scoop.

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43. What’s a potato’s least favorite dance?

The Mash Potato.

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44. Why can’t a farmer keep secrets on her farm?

Because the corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes, and the beans stalk.

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45. Why did I win the potato-hiding contest?

Because my carbo-hide-rate was so good.

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46. Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster?

Because he was a common-tater.

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47. Why does everyone love sweet potatoes?

They’re yammy.

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48. What do you call a french dog that loves potatoes?

A pomme de terrier.

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49. What’s a potato’s favorite song to dance to at a Halloween party?

The “Monster Mash.”

Best Potato Puns and Jokes

50. What kind of potato would Kim Jong Un be?

A dic-tater.

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51. What’s the difference between pea soup and mashed potatoes?

Anyone can mash potatoes, but no one can pea soup.

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52. What do you call a potato that gets things done?

A facilitate.

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53. What is a potato’s life philosophy?

I think, therefore I yam.

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54. Mr. Potato Head’s wife is upset.

She claims he won’t tater anywhere.

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55. “How was your day?” The steak asked the gloomy potato.

The potato replied, “It was tater-ible.”

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56. What do you call a passenger train made out of sweet potatoes?

A Yamtrack

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57. Why does everyone love cooking with potatoes?

They’re very a-peeling.

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58. Why did the sea monster eat twelve ships that were carrying potatoes?

Because nobody can eat just one potato ship!

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59. Why didn’t the potato want his daughter to marry the news reporter?

Because he was a commen-tater.

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60. How did the Irish potato become bilingual?

He became a French Fry.

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61. Why did the French fry win the race?

Because it was fast food.

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62. Russia decided to launch a satellite full of potatoes into orbit to see what would happen.

It’s called the SPUDnic.

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63. What do potatoes eat for breakfast?

Pota-toast with jelly.

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64. What is the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?

One’s a heated yam, and one’s a yeeted ham.

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65. What instrument does a spud play?

A “tuber.”

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66. A guy goes into a store and asks if they sell Potato Clocks. The assistant says, “Sorry sir, we don’t. We have battery clocks, electrical clocks, wind-up clocks. In fact, I’ve never heard of a potato clock.” The man says…

“Neither have I, but I start my new job at nine tomorrow, and my wife said I should get a potato clock.”

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67. How did the burger propose to the fry?

With an onion ring?

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68. Why didn’t the potato chips believe anything the sandwich said?

Because the sandwich was full of baloney.

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69. Two Amish women are digging potatoes in a field. The first turn to the other hefts two large taters, and says, “These potatoes remind me of my Jacob.”

The second replies, “They’re that big?”

“No,” the first says. “They’re that dirty.”