Bears are big, powerful, yet most cuddly-looking animals. Bears also have excellent navigational skills as well as memory, which is why it is highly likely that they will remember you. So, don’t crack any bear jokes with them around. If you want to laugh at some less dangerous animals, we suggest sheep jokes, goat jokes, or even duck jokes.
Do you know how you can enjoy bears without fearing for your life? With our list of hilarious bear jokes and puns that will have you on your paws!
Let’s get right into them!
Hilarious Bear Jokes
1. Why did the bear quit his second job?
He needed some koala-ty time with his family.
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2. Why did the bear dissolve in water?
Because it was polar.
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3. What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
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4. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
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5. Where do teenage polar bears go dancing?
The snow-ball.
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6. Why did Mother Nature make only one Yogi Bear?
Because when she tried to make a second one, she made a Boo-Boo.
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7. What is a polar bear’s favorite cereal?
Ice Crispies.
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8. How do you start a teddy bear race?
Ready, teddy, GO!
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9. What is a polar bear’s favorite healthy snack?
Iceberg lettuce and snow peas.
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10. Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they’re in black and white.
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11. What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
A solar bear.
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12. Why didn’t the baby leave his momma?
Because he couldn’t bear it!
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13. How do bears travel when they go on vacation?
Bear-o-planes.
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14. What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala!
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15. What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
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16. What did the teddy bear say after dinner?
I’m stuffed.
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17. How can a bear catch fish without a pole?
They use their bear hands.
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18. Why did the bear cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off!
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19. Why is it cheap to feed polar bears?
Because they live on ice only.
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20. What do you call bears without ears?
B’s.
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21. Why don’t bears eat fast food?
Because it’s hard for them to catch.
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22. What does pooh eat at parties?
Blue bear-y pie.
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23. Why did the bear quit his job at the daycare center?
It was panda-monium!
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24. Why did Tigger look in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh.
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25. How did the grizzly bear walk in the snow?
Bear-footed.
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26. Why did the sloth get fired from his job?
He would only do the bear minimum.
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27. Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
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28. What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A bear-faced lyre!
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29. What color socks do bears wear?
None. They usually have bear feet.
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30. What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
31. Why do bears have a hairy coat?
Fur protection.
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32. What is as big as a bear but weighs nothing?
Its shadow!
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33. Where does a polar bear go to vote?
The North Pole.
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34. How do you apologize to a koala?
Bear your heart and soul.
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35. What do you call a teddy bear at the North Pole?
Lost!
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36. What do you call a grizzly bear in a phone booth?
Stuck!
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37. How do koalas stay cool in the summer?
Bear conditioning.
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38. What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the PU!
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39. People often ask what I do at the teddy bear factory. My reply?
“Just stuff.”
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40. What do you get when you cross a bear with a garden?
Squash!
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41. What are teddy bear poops called?
Fleeces.
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42. What do you call a wet bear?
A drizzly bear.
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43. What do you call a teddy bear who rides a bike everywhere?
Schwinnie the Pooh.
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44. Why do polar bears have fur coats?
Because they would look weird in ski jackets.
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45. What’s a koala’s favorite drink?
A root bear float.
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46. What does Pooh Bear call his significant other?
Hunny.
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47. How does a bear stop a movie?
It hits the paws button.
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48. What do you get when you cross a teddy bear with a wild hog?
A teddy boar.
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49. Two bears are walking through the woods when one stops abruptly.
“Hey, what’re you doing?” the first bear asks.
“I’m just paws-ing for a break!” replied the other.
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50. Why was the bear cub so spoiled?
Because his mother panda’d to his every whim!
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51. Do you know you only need two letters to spell panda?
You need a P and A.
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52. What do you call a bear that jumps but never lands?
Peter Panda.
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53. How does the koala bear stay fit?
He does bear-obics.
Funny Bear Puns
54. It is im-paws-ible to find a bad bear joke!
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55. My jokes are un-bear-lievable!
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56. These jokes are un-bear-able!
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57. What kind of socks do you bear?
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58. I’m just paws-ing for a break.
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59. I can bearly stand another one of your puns!
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60. I can’t bear it here without you!
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61. Just bear with me, I’ll think of a good joke in a minute!
Your Turn! 🐻
We hope that you loved our bear jokes. Which one was your favorite?
Let us know in the comments down below!
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