“The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.” – William James.
Paras(name changed) is a Software Engineer at Alyve Health. He has been keen on coding since school and is eager to learn more about it.
When Paras was exposed to programming, he knew technology would be his calling. However, when one side of his professional life brought immense success, his personal life brought mental turmoil that seemed almost more complex than the most confusing line of code.
“My hobbies are simply chilling and making friends, but my passion is exploring new things and always finding the next challenging thing.”
Since childhood, adventure and going beyond boundaries have been part of the life of this young scholar, who characterises these and the enabling qualities that his very supportive family encouraged. He reminisces about how close he was to his mother, how his school performance was a satisfactory 60-70%, and how there was comfort without the pressures often loaded onto young students.
Even though this provided a solid foundation, elements of personal life only partially dovetailed as seamlessly as his professional success.
Paras heard about YourDOST through Alyve Health, which had partnered with the platform as their official mental health partner. He wasn’t sure what to expect but could use some much-needed clarity and solutions to the self-doubts and relationship issues he has been experiencing.
“I did not have excellent romantic relationships. After every relationship, I would question my values and accuse myself of not being good enough. It wasn’t just limited to romantic relationships; I had difficulty building deeper relationships with people outside my family and didn’t know why.”
These challenges had alienated him and started affecting his mental health adversely. Anxiety that accompanied these emotions resulted in further intensification of the sense of alienation.
When Paras encountered Ms Shravya Devadhar, he knew he had found a connection through YourDOST.
“My first impression of her was fantastic. She understood even little problems I had trouble with right from the start. Her intuitive solutions made me feel heard.”
As they moved on to his issues, Shravya assisted Paras in revealing some of the deeper, more complex challenges he faced. Throughout four or five sessions, they were able to tackle two or three key issues that had been holding him back.
He says he feels the most significant obstacle was the insecurity he always had towards himself.
“I used to question myself at every nook and corner, which is not good for any growing individual. Shravya introduced me to a technique that helped me to look at myself from a third-person point of view.”
This change of perspective helped him look at himself objectively and judge situations without the cloud of insecurity he had developed over time. Another eye-opener came when Shravya made him realise most of his misery was due to thoughts that were not based on reality.
“Most of my anxiety came from assumptions I made. 90% of my thoughts were just worst-case scenarios that never actually happened.”
These concerns formed a glass wall between him and what he wanted to learn. However, understanding the basis of these thoughts and how to defeat them equipped him with his newfound freedom.
With all these insights, Paras began to feel concrete positive changes in his daily life. The self-doubt that earlier nagged his mind started to fade away, replaced by a quiet confidence in his abilities.
“The things that I was doubting about myself started improving. That is something that my intellectual ability needed to take this challenge, but that’s not the case. I realised it was just an assumption I had built in my head.”
As he began testing himself in real life, he realised that his perceptions had been grossly flawed. He grew confident with every little victory he met, a sense of empowerment he had never known. Through his sessions with Shravya, Paras learned to believe more in himself, to listen louder to the sound of new experiences, and to break free from all sorts of constraints he imposed on himself.
“Slowly, I started gaining confidence. I began telling myself, ‘I’m doing better every day,’ which felt good when I believed it.”
He is deeply grateful for the support and guidance that Shravya has provided.
“The work she is doing is wonderful. She listens carefully, remembers everybody’s life story, and gives actionable insights instead of letting me vent. That made all the difference.”
Today, if he were to rate himself, he would give it a good 4.5 out of 5. He says improvement is not overnight perfection but incremental progression towards a peaceful state of mind.
Thanks to YourDOST and Shravya’s guidance, he is on this journey of self-discovery with the confidence to face whatever lies ahead today!
Paras’s Warrior Tips:
1.“People who go through a lot sometimes lose all hope in their lives. We should all make it a point to help these people regain hope.”
2.“This can be done by professionals or even loved ones so that they do not feel alone in their life journey.”
Are you someone who has gone through a difficult phase and emerged stronger and better, with some professional help? Share your story with us to encourage thousands of others who might be struggling. Click here to submit your story.
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