Do you ever get tired of hearing the same old jokes?
Well, we have a list of some great ‘what’s the difference’ jokes that will keep things fresh. You’ll never know what you’ve been missing out on!
We hope these jokes give you something to laugh about, so let’s get into it right away!
Best ‘What’s The Difference Between’ Jokes
1. What is the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
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2. What’s the difference between a piano, glue, and a tuna?
You can tuna piano, but you can’t piano a tuna.
And what about the glue?
We knew you’d get stuck on that.
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3. What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws. The other has a pause at the end of its clause.
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4. What’s the difference between an Italian barber and an angry circus ringmaster?
One’s a shaving Roman and the others a raving showman.
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5. What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?
One makes facsimiles, and the other makes sick families.
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6. What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
The teacher says to spit your gum out, and the train says: “chew chew chew.”
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7. What’s the difference between a dead dinosaur and a lump of coal?
A million years.
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8. What’s the difference between Santa Claus and a dog?
Santa Claus wears a suit and a dog just…pants!
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9. What’s the difference between a Zippo and a hippo?
One is heavy, while the other one is a little lighter.
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10. What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A cat has nine lives. A frog croaks every night.
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11. What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?
I don’t know, and I don’t care.
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12. What’s the difference between a catfish and a thief?
One’s a bottom-dwelling scum sucker; the other’s just a fish.
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13. What’s the difference between a violinist and a dog?
The dog knows when to stop scratching.
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14. What’s the difference between a booger and broccoli?
Kids won’t eat broccoli.
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15. What’s the difference between a guitar and a jellyfish?
You can’t strum a jellyfish.
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16. What’s the difference between a macaw and a banjo?
One’s loud, obnoxious, and noisy. The other’s a bird.
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17. What’s the difference between the winner of a body-building competition and a couch potato?
One has a trophy for muscles, and the other has muscle atrophy.
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18. What’s the difference between a jeweler and a sea captain?
One sees the watches, and the other watches the seas.
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19. What’s the difference between a pie and a cobbler?
One’s a dessert, and the other one makes shoes.
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20. What’s the difference between a beautiful night and a horror night?
A beautiful night is when you hug your teddy bear and sleep. A horror night is when your teddy bear hugs you back.
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21. What’s the difference between a female ant and a male ant?
A girl ant sinks in the water. A buoyant floats.
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22. What’s the difference between a viola and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.
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23. What’s the difference between a battle horse and a cart horse?
One darts into the fray, and the other farts into the hay.
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24. What’s the difference between a yacht and a boat?
About $100 million.
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25. What’s the difference between an onion and an accordion?
No one cries when you chop up an accordion!
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26. What’s the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins with: “Once upon a time…”, while a Southern fairytale starts with: “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this…”
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27. What’s the difference between a washing machine and a violist?
Vibrato.
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28. What’s the difference between a museum and Mordor?
One does not simply walk into Mordor.
29. What’s the difference between the Dark Knight and a dark night?
The letter K.
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30. What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
One you’ll see later; the other one you’ll see in a while.
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31. What’s the difference between a jeweler and a jailer?
One sells watches, and the other watches cells.
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32. What’s the difference between toilet paper and the Starship Enterprise?
Nothing, they both try to get rid of Klingons.
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33. What’s the difference between America and a pen drive?
One is the USA, and the other is a USB.
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34. What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef, but not everybody can pea soup.
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35. What’s the difference between your best high score and your worst epic fail?
A bit.
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36. What’s the difference between pizza and your opinion?
I asked for the pizza.
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37. What’s the difference between a fisherman and a lazy schoolboy?
One baits his hook, and the other hates his book.
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38. What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.
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39. What’s the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
Their seasoning.
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40. What’s the difference between a restaurant lounge and an elephant fart?
One’s a barroom, and the other’s a BARROOM.
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35. What’s the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
Outlaws are wanted.
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36. What’s the difference between a German Tiger and a Siberian Tiger?
One can survive the winter.
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37. What’s the difference between rain and a shower?
Consent.
More Hilarious ‘What’s The Difference’ Jokes
38. What’s the difference between a pork chop and a small rock entering Earth’s atmosphere from space?
One’s meaty, but the other is a little meteor.
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39. What’s the difference between a snail’s eye and a slug’s eye?
Nothing. They’re eye-tentacle.
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40. What’s the difference between an optimist and a pessimist?
An optimist is a guy who created the airplane. A pessimist is a guy who invented the parachute.
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41. What’s the difference between cake and pie?
πr², cakes are round.
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42. What is the difference between a literalist and a kleptomaniac?
A comma. A literalist takes everything literally. A kleptomaniac takes literally everything.
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43. What is the difference between a $200 wine and a $20 wine?
$180.
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44. What’s the difference between a Stoat and a Weasel?
A weasel is weasely recognized, whereas a Stoat is totally different.
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45. What’s the difference between putting a microchip in a snail and punching a grasshopper in the face?
One is bugging a slug. The other is slugging a bug.
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46. What’s the difference between the universe and a German Autobahn (highway)?
The universe has a speed limit.
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47. What’s the difference between a tennis ball and the prince of Wales?
One is heir to the throne, and the other is thrown into the air.
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48. What is the difference between elephants and grapes?
Grapes are purple.
(Read more stupid jokes here!)
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49. What do you get when you cross a sheep and a porcupine?
An animal that can sew its own sweaters.
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50. What’s the difference between chemistry jokes and physics jokes?
Chemistry jokes can be funny periodically, but physics jokes have more potential.
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51. What’s the difference between a TV and a newspaper?
Ever tried swatting a fly with a TV?
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52. What’s the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?
Timing.
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53. What’s the difference between a baby and a salad?
Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.
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54. What’s the difference between a cat and a banana?
It’s hard to peel a cat.
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55. What’s the difference between a boring teacher and a boring book?
You can shut the book up.
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56. What’s the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?
People in Dubai don’t like The Flintstones, but people in Abu Dhabi doooo!
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57. What’s the difference between a boring teacher and a boring book?
You can shut the book up.
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58. What’s the difference between a cow and a pig?
One is a pig.
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59. What’s the difference between a bird and a fly?
A bird can fly, but a fly can’t bird!
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60. Dad: What’s the difference between an elephant and a postbox?
Son: I don’t know.
Dad: I’d better not trust you with my post then.
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61. What’s the difference between a school and a human?
A human can walk, and a school can’t.
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62. What is the difference between a tree and a school?
A school is for kids, and a tree is for birds.
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63. What’s the difference between a square peg in a round hole and a kilo of lard?
One’s a good lot of fat, and the other’s a fat lot of good.
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64. What’s the difference between a Business Man and a Business Woman?
Wo.
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65. What’s the difference between Covid-19 and Romeo and Juliet?
One’s the coronavirus, and the other is a Verona crisis!
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66. What’s the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot’s father?
One’s a pop fly. The other’s a fly pop.
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67. What’s the difference between an African elephant and an Indian elephant?
About 5000 miles.
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68. What’s the difference between England and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
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69. What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?
Valentines Day.
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70. What’s the difference between weather and climate?
You can’t weather a tree, but you can climate!
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71. What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
The lawyer charges more.
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72. What’s the difference between a jet airplane and a trumpet?
About three decibels.
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73. What’s the difference between a banjo and an onion?
Nobody cries when you chop up a banjo.
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74. What’s the difference between a dog and a cat?
The spelling!
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75. What’s the difference between a tuba and a vacuum cleaner?
You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.
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76. What’s the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw?
You can tune a chainsaw.
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77. What’s the difference between an injured lion and a wet day?
One pours with rain, the other roars with pain!
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78. What’s the difference between an owl and an Irish funeral?
One’s awake in the night, and the other’s awake in the day!
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79. What’s the difference between a violin and a cello?
The cello burns longer.
Your Turn
Now, it is your turn to tell us a joke!
Let’s hear your favorite ‘what’s the difference’ jokes in the comment section below.
See you in the next post!
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