The grief of losing someone very dear to us manifests itself in different forms for different people. Sometimes, it pulls us down; at other times, it pushes us to strive for more. Here is the story of a warrior who fought through her grief and is battling life’s journey one day at a time.
Sherene is a 30-year-old vibrant marketing professional at Freshworks who is passionate, empathetic, and loves new adventures and experiences.
She started with an engineering degree from Trichy, Tamil Nadu, and did her MBA in Bangalore, which put her directly into marketing and branding. For nearly six years, she worked in Mumbai when life took a twist, bringing her back to Chennai as the world entered the COVID-19 lockdown.
From the beginning, she has had a demanding and ambitious professional life; however, an unfateful loss shook her to the core when she lost one of her best friends. This made her re-evaluate how radically intense her career was eating into her mind.
“I quit my job in Mumbai because I couldn’t take that demanding career anymore as if my world hadn’t changed. I hadn’t got any offer to move forward, but I had just lost my friend, and that broke something in me.”
Sherene and her husband shifted from Mumbai to Chennai, and she needed to figure out what to anticipate in Chennai. However, the very first day brought Sherene a silver lining when she received the interview call from Freshworks, which she credits to God’s miraculous grace. She started her new chapter with the job but found the move was not as easy as it seemed.
“It was my first time living in Chennai, in a new city, with a new job and industry. Added to this was the fact that the pandemic had everybody in lockdown, and it cut me off from familiar faces and routines.”
The change was weighing heavily on Sherene as she struggled with not sharing her grief with anyone while, on the surface, trying to make people at her home and work happy. Although a blessing, her job with Freshworks was in a different industry altogether, and Sherene was highly under pressure to prove herself.
“I was burned out in the workplace because there was so much to do. The pressure I put on myself to prove myself in a new industry was intense. I was so frustrated with everything and everybody, but nobody was to blame. I was annoyed at myself.”
This was a storm of emotions, and when it seemed she was close to breaking, Sherene finally reached out for help through YourDOST, which partners with Freshworks as its mental health partner. She was always an advocate for therapy and counselling among her friends, but this time, she needed it for herself. After some initial searching, she connected with Dr. Anita Eliza, who was a guiding light during the darkest moments of her life.
“Finding the right counselor is like a journey you must make when you’re feeling sick to find the right doctor. Even though finding the right fit as a counselor was a difficult process, when I reached out to Dr Anita, something felt right. Finally, I felt like somebody got me.”
Dr. Anita’s therapeutic approach balanced empathy with actionable advice, which Sherene needed at that time.
“What I liked about her is that she struck a fine balance between empathising and giving me things I could do or think about. I would feel heard and walk away with something to change or work on–mostly about myself, the person I had the most control over.”
The most meaningful lesson Sherene learned through counseling was setting boundaries and leaving her comfort zone. She realised she had burnt herself out trying to please others constantly by absorbing their feelings and holding herself responsible. Dr. Anita guided her to concentrate only on what she could control, like her actions, words, and emotions.
“I am learning things daily, but the biggest thing I have taken away is that I’m not controlling everybody’s happiness. I’ve relieved myself of unnecessary pressure and worked on changing how my thoughts are wired, focusing on what I can change”.
Sherene was not on some journey of techniques or instant fixes but of changing her mind, and she learned she could deal with even the worst of circumstances without feeling worthless or victimised.
And now, as Sherene has taken on the new role of a mother, she carries lessons learned through the journey into counseling into this new chapter of life.
“I thank God for helping me meet Dr Anita and all the help I received from her. I truly hope that others, like my friend, found assistance the minute they needed it most.”
Today, Sherene gives herself a solid 4 out of 5 points on how she feels better and continues to see “imperfect progress” one day at a time. Her journey has seen potholes and barriers, but she credits her faith in God and the resilience she has built through her counseling journey for continuing to persevere through it.
We at YourDOST are proud of Sherene’s journey and wish her the best for the future!
Sherene’s Warrior Tips:
1.“Taking sessions for mental health is still seen as taboo in places, but it is no different than taking medicines for physical health. We should be able to ask for help when and where we need it.”
2.“Do not dissociate yourself from activities you love. Even if it’s one thing you can do that you love, continue investing in it and take it easy on yourself.”
3.“Always reach out to people with whom you feel heard, be it a friend or a counselor, and don’t close up with a victim mentality.”
Are you someone who has gone through a difficult phase and emerged stronger and better, with some professional help? Share your story with us to encourage thousands of others who might be struggling. Click here to submit your story.
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